Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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