his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize