Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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