he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
