The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize