alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
