I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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