hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Randomize
