so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
