You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
You may now shotgun with the bride
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
