"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
