why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
