Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
this is an emotional support booty call
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
