Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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