Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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