The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize