If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
