dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
