Can Purell be used as lube?
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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