she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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