I want to walk on stilts...naked
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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