That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
