He passed out mid-signature
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
