i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Randomize
