I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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