I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
My vagina is very pro this idea
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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