i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
