So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize