i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
