There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
