My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
