i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize