Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
