im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
