the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I am available for nakedness
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
