I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
NoShamevember. You game?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
