He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Randomize
