Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
