i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Randomize
