All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I think I died a long time ago.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
