1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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