just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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