I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
