East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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