he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
