I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
sex in a hospital.. check
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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