she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
