She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Randomize