Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
