I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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