you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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