Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
