this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize